So, a couple of weeks ago I started feeling more icky than normal. The bloating is excessive, the pain moving through my tummy excruciating. Add in a few strange muscle spasms (one is in my upper lip), the odd smell of fish when I heat up water (seriously wtf?) and lower back pain and you get Ovarian Cysts. Whoopie.

Menopause brings on a whole host of issues that make me feel like I am dying everyday but this one has already lasted two weeks and I’m not dead. I went to Urgent Care with extreme stomach pain hoping it was just a poop issue but nope, that was clean. I knew it was cysts but wanted an easy out. That didn’t work.

Knowing that there were no gynecologist appointments available for at least two and a half weeks, because I did call and ask, I emailed my primary to issue a referral for a pelvic ultrasound which was performed on Tuesday. This is why I continually say that YOU must take your own care into your own hands. If I had waited for the appointment to get the ultrasound, this process would be two weeks or more additionally delayed. That was prevented by getting the ultrasound before the doctor’s appointment.

I have three current cysts: two on the right and one on the left. Each side has one that is 11mm in size. The other is only 3mm currently. When they do the ultrasound this next time, they will have a measuring point to see if the cysts grew.

Ovarian cancer does not run in the family but exploding cysts do and they suck. You must be very careful with these suckers because they can do harm, not usually, but sometimes. Don’t get all worked up over it.

In my life, I have had this before. They were small, inconsequential. Not anymore. The doctors call me “post-menopausal” but if they think twenty plus hot flashes a day is “post-menopausal” they know squat about menopause. BUT, in “post-menopausal” women, these cysts are more likely to be cancerous.

So, in reading about these balls in my ovaries I tried asking the internet what the fluid in these sacks are. There is no answer on the web. Personally, I think they are filled with hormones because last night I had such pain, which I can totally handle, but I started crying uncontrollably for no reason. It happened twice. This morning I seem all right. Possibly a bursting cyst?

Now the symptoms of ovarian cysts are like having gastrointestinal issues. Stomach pain, bloating, gas etc. All are also menopause symptoms. So, when do you react? After two weeks apparently.

And when you eat, if you can, if you want to, it seems to make the pain ever so slightly worse. Ever so slightly. You know I’m being sarcastic right? So I’m starving myself and getting fatter in the process.

Now I wait. I wait to see if the cysts grow bigger, become solid, or burst and if they burst, I have to make sure the fluid they release doesn’t cause other issues. If I get a fever, it’s a trip to the Emergency Room immediately.

I did make an appointment with the gyno who claimed I needed a new referral because my other one was for menopausal symptoms. Ummmm, I’m no doctor, but cysts “post” menopausal, which they state I am in, is menopausal and therefore I explained the referral stands and I got my way. AND in prepping for what could come, this doctor visit has been scheduled as a surgical consult because If I am still in pain in two weeks, they will ask for another ultrasound to see if the cysts changed and if they got bigger, I’ll opt for surgery.

This feels like the pain I would get days before my period but worse. All that equipment was removed though back in 2008. It’s times like these that make you crawl into the fetal position. I’m not sure what helped more last night, the Tylenol or the Irish Cream in my decaf coffee. It didn’t last but I got a tiny bit of relief.

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